Charli Mills wants us to talk about whispers for this week’s Carrot Ranch 99-word flash fiction challenge. My offering is BOTS about the infamous former mental hospital, Eloise here in Wayne County Michigan. I can vouch for the fact that this place is haunted, without them having to create an attraction!
Pilar shook as she clutched at her hoodie. It wasn’t the temperature it was the atmosphere. With every step she took in the October darkness, she thought she heard another faint voice.
Get out
This is my home
You are not welcome here
Her head moved like the beam of a lighthouse as she searched for a face. But there was no one in sight. Only dead trees and rocks,
She ran when another voice moaned.
I died here
GET OUT
It was a BIG mistake to visit the Halloween attraction on the grounds of a former mental hospital.
©2021 Annette Rochelle Aben
Oooh, creepy! I really like the way you build atmosphere here! It makes me want to know more about the one who died…
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🙂
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Reblogged this on Ed;s Site..
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Thank you for the reblog!
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Ooooh, very creepy, Annette. This calls for a sequel about the adventure of the visitor.
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😉
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I love the creepy atmosphere you built up in this piece. I’d have had second thoughts going there on Halloween, though. I’d probably have only visited on the first day of summer.
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Thank you, Hugh. I am inclined to agree about the visit.
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That makes it even creepier, Annette!
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Yes, ma’am!
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I agree. I leave anything even mildly ghost-related, well alone. They have their realm, and we have ours. I don’t relate one bit to the supposed thrill of it all.
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For those who had family there over the years, when it was a fully functioning hospital, there are such mixed emotions over this.
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I’d imagine so. It’d be a powerful thing, to speak to those we’ve lost, if only powerful for our hearts.
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