What I Have Been Learning

Okay, a few weeks ago, I posted that I was in the hospital, being treated for a wound on my right leg, that had become infected. As I had not been in the hospital since 2006, it was a shock to my system to find myself in the back of an ambulance, being whisked away to the land of needles and nurses.

I spent 13 days in that hospital, had surgery to clean out the wound and had a couple xrays as well. Physical and Occupational Therapy people put me through my paces but the most remarkable of all the services was the use of the Wound Vac. The purpose of the wound vac (as it was explained to me) was to aid the wound in healing quicker.

The afternoon of the 13th day, I was transported, by ambulance once again, to a rehab center. Technically I was on the mend but not mended enough to nor require around the clock care. I would be able to receive all the care I had in the hospital except for surgery.

Today is my 12th day at the rehab center and I have to say, that in addition to making some friends, sleeping and eating, I have had loads of time to think. I have been thinking, lately, of what I have been learning from the experience.

 About others: People may take a job because they need the money, and there is no shame in that because we can all use money. However, it is evident that this can create resentment in the heart of the employee which can then be taken out on those form whom they do their job.

About Others: People may take a job because it is a stepping stone to something greater and grander. They can be curious about everything because they love soaking  up knowledge. They can also sleep walk through their shift because they can become jaded to the work, since the work is not the job they will have in the end.

 About Others: People may take a job because they believe they are a perfect fit for the responsibilities. They strive to make the most of the experience because they love seeing others feel as good as they do while sharing the moment.

About Myself: I have had to learn to practice what I preach to the nth degree. To hold my tongue when I would rather lash out and to speak up when I would rather dismiss something with a wave of my hand.

 About Myself: I have had to remember that there are ways of getting one’s point across without blame. To not only say something to the people who have the power to make the “issue” go away, but to offer a potential solution. Of course, the next step is to let go of the need to know how it will be resolved.

About Myself: I have had to accept that it is okay to let my emotions show when I am afraid. And that being afraid is okay. What is amazing is. feeling the fear and doing it anyway (sometimes I have had NO choice in the matter).

I have tried to be an active participant by not only doing what I am told (for the most part) taking the medications, doing my therapy exercises and answering and asking a myriad of questions.

I have tried to present an energy of tolerance and acceptance, especially when those around me are so caught up in their own pain that they have lost their religion.

I have made it a point to learn the names of everyone with whom I come in contact, their roles in my wellness journey and to show I am interested in them as people. Why? Because people care more about you when they know you care and that makes the situations such as eluded to in the previous paragraph a bit easier to handle.

I smile, make jokes, sing at the top of my lungs and speak gratitude to and with everyone from the janitorial staff, the nurses, aides and doctors, the kitchen staff (important to make friends with the ones who make your food) and administration. Sure, I get looks, groans and watch people as they walk away with their heads shaking but I also get smiles, hugs and hear laughter ringing throughout the halls as people go about their business.

As I have been rather a recluse for over a year, I very much resented having to be at the mercy of the folks who were necessary to every thing I needed to do from eating to bathing to toileting. Yet, I knew that I could either suck it up and be a “team player” or fight them every step of the way, on general principles. The biggest general principle I wrapped my head around, was to treat others as I wish to be treated.

side note…  I have to say, that sometimes it has not changed the situation, it only changed me, which changed my perception of my situation. Guess we are never too old to learn, eh?

In a place where some people come with hope of leaving one day, some come with no hope of leaving alive and others know they are here temporarily, there can be no predicting moods or motives. Since one cannot control the participants, one can only create one’s own personal atmosphere. It isn’t about “grin and bear it” it is all about “be at peace and share it”!

p.s. I do have a lovely window here, through which I can watch critters frolic, the sun rise and set and stay connected to Mother Nature. I am truly blessed.

AND thank you for all the love and support, I feel ya and send it back from the bottom of my heart!